Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage

I both love and hate Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage. This story had me on such a rollercoaster of emotions that I feel like I might burst by literally not knowing how to feel. The book opens up with Tsukuru Tazaki as a sophomore in college contemplating suicide. The first bit of this book is a dark and tragic look at a lonely young adult in the sprawling city of Tokyo just barely holding on to his life. 

As the book unfolds you find out what made Tsukuru get to this point. He makes a close bond with four others in his high school in a city outside of Tokyo. The five bond to a level that I'll be honest I'm not sure I exactly buy or understand. Before his Sophomore year in college, the friends abandon him. They close out all communication with him and don't tell him why. And so the book flows through Tsukuru's life as he deals with the pain of loss, abandonment, and not feeling as though he matters. 

I've never read a Murakami book before. I've had 1Q84 on my list forever and even tried it once but didn't get very far. And yet this slow-paced book about Tsukuru enraptured me in a way very few books have. And although I have a ton of problems with this book, I literally want to start reading another Murakami book right now. There is a beauty to Murakami's writing that was translated into English that swept me away. 

As I said before, there is also a slew of problems with this book. It treats sex in an odd and off-putting manner. There is a friend that Tsukuru makes in his later college years that's odd and unresolved. In fact, a lot of this novel ends unresolved, left to the reader to endlessly speculate. I loved this book, flaws and all. It's a book that consumed me and one that I doubt I will forget anytime soon.